It's a fairytale ballpark with *almost* perfect bathrooms

Today I saw my first game at Target Field. We lost, but that's probably because Joe Mauer, a.k.a. "Baby Jesus," wasn't playing. Blasphemous, perhaps, but hey, I didn't come up with it. Whoever did, though, was brilliant because they can just buy a shit ton of WWJD bracelets and sell them to some pro shop for like $12 a piece, and then the pro shop can sell them to us for like $36 a piece. Anyways, our losing did not really detract from the blatant awesomeness of our new park.

I look slightly bewildered because I'm not photogenic.

My first impression related to this outing - not necessarily to the game, the team, or the field - was gained on my ride to park on the light rail and it is this: people kind of smell. So I guess I'm really glad it's open-air, because there were A LOT of people there, and after the most crowded train ride I've ever had, I can only assume that a lot of those people smelled.

My second impression was that a lot of money has gone into this place. I'm clearly having an obvious day, ok? The giant Budweiser sign, the epic screen that I'm pretty sure is going to get someone killed someday because you can see it from the freeway, the Twin Cities homage that lights up in various ways when various plays are made... seriously, what's the electric bill like for this place? I realize that the park is LEED certified, which is worth the money. I'm just saying. Also, if my sources are correct (and by "sources" I mean my husband), there are like 50 extra people on staff just to take care of the grass. That would mean every person is responsible for 2,000 square feet of turf - an area more than twice as large as my city-sized back yard, where I cannot control the creeping charlie, dandelions, crab grass, and maple saplings.

By the way, I appreciate that the MN sign shows a crowd-pleasing cordial - even friendly - bond between Minneapolis and St. Paul (a.k.a. "Pig's Eye"), but let's be honest... Minneapolis should be punching St. Paul in the face while St. Paul is kicking Minneapolis in the groin. Also, the bat that St. Paul is holding should really be a bottle of Irish whiskey.

Anyways, this is the view from our seats. Denard Span takes a strike. Also seen from our seats: a lot of Justin Morneau. "Jason," as you may know him from when he won the homerun derby.

Ok, now here's what I really wanted to post about: the bathrooms. To hubs's horror, I did take pictures. Impression 3: Target is really pushing this "green" thing, which is cool but confusing given the exorbitant electrical "needs" of the park. Refer to the LEED Certification mentioned above. This sign is posted inside every bathroom stall door:

Dual-flush toilets. Awesome. Saves a lot of water. Impression 4: Target wanted to protect our health, but they kind of missed the mark on how to do this.

Apparently, "green" is not only a lifestyle, it's a germ-resistant color. Isn't it kind of a rule that you just flush with your foot in public restrooms? I feel like we've already figured out that part and don't really need the coated handle. What we do need are doors that open outward so you don't have to touch a handle on your way out, right after washing your hands. Right after washing your hands with hot water and soap, people. You disgust me. Or at least they should put a trash can next to the door so you can open it with a paper towel. Or they could just get bathroom attendants.

Final impression: Target Field offers the most delicious hot chocolate I've ever had. Also, the largest hot dogs I've ever had. I seriously had trouble getting my mouth around it and felt like it was some kind of sick joke.

Crossing my fingers that the weather is this nice every time!

Hey, I cleaned the bathroom floors yesterday.

And on the crafting front, I haven't been doing nothing, it only seems like it because the blog is gathering dust. Mostly I'm trying to get ready for the Spring Market, which means making stuff that probably won't go up on Etsy because I'm sure it will all sell at the show, plus redoing business cards and updating "the books" and laying out how I'll display things, and so on. Lots to do. Also, Becky and I made a special birthday package for our Aunt Colleen that included this:


and this:


Apparently I didn't take pictures of the other stuff - an apple, three strawberries, a lemon, a lime, an orange, and a pear. Becky's pear is my fave. She's got excellent pictures here. Seb's toy food was the inspiration, but we stuck to fruits for a theme. No ice cream cones. The grapes were a by-the-seat-of-my-pants creation, and I'm pleased at how the purple rounded out the colors in the collection.

It took me long enough

I said I was going to post my as-of-yet favorite original design on Etsy like eight weeks ago and I finally did. Well, I said it last week. But here she is:


I'm particularly pleased with the loopy tail.



Onward!

Wild and plushy items on Etsy!

New stuff up today! These are the first baby items in the shop.




This is Green-butt Ben. There are better pictures in the shop. And there's one more item going up later that is my favorite, so you'll have to look at the shop to see.

Bwahahahaha! Using a child for profit is, in this case, totally hilarious.

My friend Heather has opened my eyes to Tiny Art Director, a blog where this dad illustrates whatever his daughter wants. It's definitely falls under "kids say the darnedest things." I don't know how he makes his living, but he's clearly an artist and has released a book stemming from the blog. Here's one of my favorites:

"Dragon and Princess"


The Brief: I want you to draw a dragon eating a girl.
The Negotiation: How about if they're actually friends?
The Critique: No, he has to have that girl is his mouth. He's not supposed to be a nice dragon. He's supposed to be a bad dragon. I want to see that girl's head pointing out of that dragon.
Job Status: Rejected
Additional Comments: He has to be biting and squishing it.

From what little I've seen of this blog, there seems to be a lot of dragons and dinosaurs eating more innocent creatures. I like this girl.

Super random post about broken needles and prodding the mind. Not in reference to a singular occurance, because that would hurt A LOT.

*cue taps*
This was one of my first sets of needles. But size six is no match for knitting front/back several times in a row. I'm a tight knitter, and this sequence of stitches just makes the yarn tighter and tighter and harder to stretch and then almost impossible to manipulate and then SNAP! For some reason I only had four to begin with, so I guess it's time to make a trip to the store.


So there's some trivial news. Also, I wanted to share this post I read today on Feministing about makeup. I wear it sometimes (ok, rarely - mostly because I'm lazy) and make no judgments on whatever people like to do (except clowns - they're frickin weird); I just find the concept fascinating. I do hate cosmetic advertising, though. Hate it. I swear, in no other industry is it so accepted to market products that promise ideals and results they can't possibly deliver. Whatever. Calm down. Ok, seriously the post is good. It got my brain working.

Joe's felted slippers; making them was quite a "feat."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Sorry.

As you can see, hubs was in desperate need of new slippers...


The $10 ones were leaving bits of themselves all over the house (which, actually, I was cool with because we just got a new vacuum and it works on every kind of floor and has sweet attachments and is so awesome that I had to empty the canister after my very first run through the house - and that truthfully doesn't even include two whole carpeted rooms).

So I went for a tried and true pattern that my friend's mom, Betty, has done a bunch of times. Here's what the slippers looked like before felting:


Jagnormous.


The best thing about them is that they knit fast so even though I had to make two of them, I did it fairly quickly. Honestly, I thought they'd be ready for next winter, so I'm pretty pleased with myself. The other best thing about them is that the felting makes them real sturdy-like so I won't have to make any more for several years.


Voila! One of them is a bit wonky for some reason, but I think (hope) that it'll sort of right itself with wear. In any case, I'm told they are comfortable.


If it were up to me, I'd put some sweet toggle buttons on them, just for interest, but I'm guessing that ain't going to fly.


Stay tuned for news about the newest items going up on Etsy!

I rule you, yeast.

Apparently, this "crafting" blog is turning into a "homemaking" blog. Whatevs.

I'm afraid of baking bread with yeast, because in the past it has failed. But TWICE now, I have been triumphant! First with this cinnamon raisin bread:


Note the highly professional swirl.

And then for delicious soups like this sausage/veggie/cheese tortellini soup:



I succeeded with a french bread. Really easy, excellent flavor.


It didn't even get ruined because I ran out of regular flour and subbed some whole wheat flour. Or because I don't have a fancy-schmancy baguette pan.

Color Career Counselor

I'll be taking career counseling tests until I die. Does that indicate a career path?

At CareerPath.com, your color tastes are analyzed by: My results:
Best Occupational Category
You're a CREATOR
Keywords: Nonconforming, Impulsive, Expressive, Romantic, Intuitive, Sensitive, and Emotional

These original types place a high value on aesthetic qualities and have a great need for self-expression. They enjoy working independently, being creative, using their imagination, and constantly learning something new. Fields of interest are art, drama, music, and writing or places where they can express, assemble, or implement creative ideas.

CREATOR OCCUPATIONS
Suggested careers are Advertising Executive, Architect, Web Designer, Creative Director, Public Relations, Fine or Commercial Artist, Interior Decorator, Lawyer, Librarian, Musician, Reporter, Art Teacher, Broadcaster, Technical Writer, English Teacher, Architect, Photographer, Medical Illustrator, Corporate Trainer, Author, Editor, Landscape Architect, Exhibit Builder, and Package Designer.

CREATOR WORKPLACES
Consider workplaces where you can create and improve beauty and aesthetic qualities. Unstructured, flexible organizations that allow self-expression work best with your free-spirited nature.

Suggested Creator workplaces are advertising, public relations, and interior decorating firms; artistic studios, theaters and concert halls; institutions that teach crafts, universities, music, and dance schools. Other workplaces to consider are art institutes, museums, libraries, and galleries.


2nd Best Occupational Category
You're a PERSUADER
Keywords: Witty, Competitive, Sociable, Talkative, Ambitious, Argumentative, and Aggressive

These enterprising types sell, persuade, and lead others. Positions of leadership, power, and status are usually their ultimate goal. Persuasive people like to take financial and interpersonal risks and to participate in competitive activities. They enjoy working with others inside organizations to accomplish goals and achieve economic success.


And then the Color Career Indicator 4.0 lists my "most fun careers." I would have to purchase the full report. Some of the ones they do disclose make sense, others confuse me...

Among the logical are Education Administrator, Middleschool Teacher, Office Manager, Administrative Assistant, Social Worker, Academic/Vocational Counselor, and Interior Designer.

Surprising but true are Firefighter, Coach, Truck Driver, Financial Manager, and Carpenter.

And then the you've-got-to-be-kidding-me ones are Customer Service Rep (sounds like a downer), EMT (getting panicky thinking about it), Stock Broker (hello, Wallstreet), and Retail Salesperson (*gagging on memories*).

What I've learned from this is that there are still a million different jobs and any one of them could be great or horrible and someone just needs to tell me what to do (for free). Keep making stuff until people start buying it, you say? Awesome, thanks.

Craft room move

So, Picasa, which is Google's photo editing software, is SO AWESOME! Because now I can add captions to my photos, there may or may not be less monotonous reading for you. Probably not. The one drawback: it has only furthered my suspicion that Google is making a run for world domination.

So we moved the craft room into the office. A whole room's worth of stuff into half the space? Yes. I'll be storing some things in the basement that I don't readily need and getting rid of a few things. GETTING RID OF A FEW THINGS. Crafting blasphemy.

Because the below-mentioned diploma was purchased via journalism school, and because journalists love puns and cliches, no matter what we may say when we're not writing headlines, I will go ahead and use the phrase "this is where the magic happens."