Wednesday's Comment Call-out: More on selling virginity

Well, here it is. One of the scathing comments that lacks any resemblance to decent, human concern for each other.

"I think the oddest part of all this is something that people rarely seem to comment on in all the attention that stories like this seem to generate:

'I'm a 22-year-old woman who recently earned her Bachelor's Degree in Women's Studies, and soon I'll be entering a Masters Degree program in Marriage and Family Therapy.'

Four years of your life have been devoted to 'Women's Studies,' and this is the best you can do? This is what you've learned in four years - to sell your ass? And you're proud of yourself for having the idea? You think that with publicity like what you've had, that you're ever going to find a job in 'Marriage and Family Therapy' anywhere? Nobody who wants to run a reputable clinic is going to touch you with a ten-foot pole.

'Hi, Mr. & Mrs. Jones. We've set you up with one of our newest therapists. You may remember her as having been the woman who sold her virginity on the internets. She'll get you both fixed right up.'

While it's laughable (and beyond ironic)to see what feminism has degraded into over the last ten or twenty years, it's still sad to see people who trumpet themselves as educated wallow in prostitution and call it feminine oriented capitalism.

I weep for you and those like you."

No you don't. You love passing judgment! "Internets," by the way, is not my misspelling. Once again, I can't get over how vindictive people are to those who don't share the same views. The commentator basically wishes Natalie Dylan ill. I don't think she'll have any trouble getting a job. Natalie Dylan has to be a pretty common name, and I'm guessing she's not going to put "sold my virginity" on her resume. And I'm guessing most employers don't have a wanted poster with her photo on it behind the desk. If you're wondering where feminism is today, it's not degraded - nor is it a pillar of puritanism. It's an ideology that probably leads the employers Dylan will apply for jobs with to believe in her prerogative to do what she deems right for herself.

Wednesday's Comment Call-out: What a boob

"I'll try to restrain the tears. I've seen pictures of the author and she's an attractive woman. She should talk to my sister sometime, who has chronic, flaking psoriasis, and see what it's like to go through life with actual social problems and widespread abuse from shallow people. I wonder if even Ms. Ginsberg would have treated my sis with the affection she deserves. Nobody else did other than my fam. I also couldn't get out of my mind the massive number of vainglorious women who intentionally augment their breasts. Who would do that when it's so obviously horrible to have them? Hmmm, I wonder how awful this condition really is. 'Woe is me! Men want me sexually and people treat me differently because I have great big breasts and I'm pretty. Boo hoo.' I guess I should walk a mile in her shoes before getting so testy over this stuff, but I've seen the other side and it gets far nastier. Some people would love to have even one man lean out of a car to say he wants to f--k them, because nobody else has said it all their lives."

This lengthy comment was left on alternet about an article originally from RH Reality Check by Samara Ginsberg. The article is titled "Women have boobs; get over it." The author describes scenarios from her youth like being held down and groped by boys, being called slutty, being told by a teacher that he likes women with curves, and hearing about rape fantasies she inspired. Does that not count as abuse?

Here is a person sharing something very intimate and humiliating about her life and I'm shocked that some commentators don't respect that. Throwing in a "I should walk a mile" statement at the end here doesn't make up for the fact that you have just done the exact thing Ginsberg is arguing we should not do - the thing that YOU are arguing we shouldn't do: invalidate and judge people based on their physical nature and bodily concerns. The poster's sister with psoriasis undoubtedly has a tough time, but does that preclude her and her family from having sympathy for other people? It does no good to compare the two situations because everyone deals with their own burdens differently. Comparing only makes the rift between "me" and "everyone else" larger. The solution to both problems (judgments and harassment of people with large breasts and people with skin issues) is founded upon building understanding and empathy instead of alienation. Then we can start reading in between the lines for more specific solutions.

Sure, it would have been nice for Ginsberg to point out her ideas of resolution, but we can use our brains, too, when we read things like "I believe that the reason that so many women feel that it’s acceptable to mock large breasts is that there is an underlying assumption that all women want larger breasts," and "It’s as if women’s breasts are public property." So is that assumption true? Where does it come from? Who does it benefit/hurt? Who's property are they? What needs to change? What can I do?

Finally, I have to say I think it's funny that this poster seems to believe Ginsberg is feeling sorry for herself (which wouldn't necessarily be uncalled for given her story) when Ginsberg states "I’m not saying: 'Boo hoo, look how difficult life is for gorgeous women, don’t hate me because I’m beautiful!' Being regarded as attractive generally makes life much easier and puts one in a position of privilege, an unfair and wholly undeserved privilege that I am aware of having."

Check out the article and comments here.

Wednesday's Comment Call-out

"They just do not get it. Why are they trying to create class warfare? I have been reading on how the Nazi's came to power. This is right from their playbook. Get everyone depended on the government. then propaganda, then arrest those that do not follow this ideoligy. We are living a scary time folks."

This is a comment from a Star Tribune article on proposed rules for the companies receiving bailout money. Specifically, placing a cap on the salaries and bonuses of the top executives, among other things. I just want to point out the Obama is not a Nazi and I think it's pretty ridiculous to make that connection. Do people not know that there is always class warfare? Under capitalism, too. Also, propaganda is innate to politics of any kind - even the politics that seep into pop culture. Who are all our movie villains these days? People who just-so-happen to look middle-eastern. Sounds just like what we call propaganda as we look back on all the movies of yore in which the villains were always Commie Reds. Let's also not forget that Obama is coming into this at a mid-point. The bailout business and a lot of other goings-on were in the works before Obama became the Dem candidate, let alone the president. Finally, I read nothing in this article that suggests anything about arrests - or, like many other commentators seem to fear, the crossover of beginning to enforce rules for companies that aren't receiving bailout dollars.

I swear, I tried to get something from the Pioneer Press, but no one seems to comment there.

Wednesday's Comment Call-out: One step forward...

This may not work well as a regular because reading comments makes me so angry sometimes and the rest of the time it's just exhausting. So this is going to be very general.

I was just reading a bunch of comments on Sarah Palin following an article about how she is/is not a feminist. They are all so scathing. I don't disagree with most of them, but at some point I was just done with all the name-calling. "She's a witch," "she's a crazy conservative," "she's a liar," and so on and so on. She's also a woman who is not immune to having her feelings hurt. Among many I know, I would not be popular for defending her but I guess I'm doing it anyways.

And that's because it's tiresome to listen to Group A criticize Group B for trying to impose their views on the world, when isn't Group A doing the same thing but with different views? I'm not saying people shouldn't express their beliefs, but I always wonder if we're doing it wrong. Especially when you're reading blogs and comments, people are so nasty. I suppose because it's easy to be mean and condescending and self-righteous when you aren't looking your prey in the face. I think feminism is about questioning, not judging. And evangelizing, be it for a religion or any other cause, is most effective when done with humility.

Regular features

I've been thinking about making this whole thing a little more structured by posting regular features a few days a week. So here's what's in the works:

Monday's Wise Words: Comments on and links to articles that are of interest to all you intelligent beings out there - focusing mostly on feminist issues.

Wednesday's Comment Call-out: Reviews of the best and worst reader comments out there - focusing on those that either make me so, so mad or laugh out loud.

Friday's Sweet Stuff: Comments on and links to products/services/people that are awesome - focusing on other local crafters.

Sunday's Mischief Managed: Comments on the life of Penny, my Jack Russell - focusing on her stinker moments.

Look out for more...coming soon!